Saturday, March 14, 2020

Pia Zadora's Magic Box!

One of the most popular features featured here at Th' House O' Foam© is the long-running feature Pia Zadora's Magic Box! feature! Yessiree Bob, it seems the th' Four Or Five Guys® can't get enough of the game sensation that's sweeping the nation!

The rules? Why, they're simplicity itself! Diminutive dynamo Pia has a "Magic Box" [at right - Ed.], and you - that's John Q. Contestant from Anytown, U.S.A. - has to guess what's inside! The contestant guessing the correct answer wins the key to her Magic Box!
(Artist's impression)

Some fun, huh kids? Who's going to be first up as Ms. Zadora asks the musical question - What's In My Box, Boys?

Today's whispered clue is - it's an album - once again for those of you on drugs - I-T'-S  A-N  A-L-B-U-M - but which? Is it Wings At The Speed Of Sound? Or perhaps Il Assassino by Adrian Gurvitz? [No - Ed.] Remember - you can have as many tries as you want! Hoo boy!

(Psst! Try Kentucky Gambler, by Robey, Falk, & Bod!)


35 comments:

  1. Living in a box, maybe? : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHzfhU8t5i8

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  2. Hopper Tunity Box.

    Hey I'm a different Rob - not the above guy trying twice. Not even four or five guys.

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  3. i'm thinking along the lines of best of burl ives, but its a wild guess

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  4. It's "Abracadabra". And not only did Pia have a lovely magic box, she had an awesome rear as well

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  5. Straight Shooter by Bad Company contains the song Shooting Star, as does On Golden Smog by Golden Smog. But then again the artist's impression suggests more than one.
    And I did try to warn you about Lieutenant Columbo. I fear all may be lost.

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  6. This was so easy!

    What's in Pia's box? Why, it's "The Thing" of course!!!

    What on earth else COULD it be?

    While I was walking down the beach one bright and sunny day
    I saw a great big wooden BOX a-floatin' in the bay
    I pulled it in and opened it up and much to my surprise
    Ooh, I discovered a (* boom-boom-boom *) right before my eyes


    (* boom-boom-boom * = Three beats to the tympani)

    ...Well, it was either that or "Put 'em in a Box, Tie 'em with a Ribbon, and Throw 'em in the Deep Blue Sea" from a couple years earlier...

    So, take that, put it in your deteck-a-tive pipe & smoke it!

    (I know, I know, the Lieutenant preferred cee-gars...)

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  7. Bad luck and trouble are my middle name . . . (The gallon size hand-sanitizer ain't doin' it, I plan to bath in a tub full later...)

    Forgot to add:

    Happy Friday the 13th ! ! !

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  8. We're getting scarily close to the right answer here, in that all of the suggestions are wildly wrong, so by the laws of Newtonian physics all following guesses must be closer to the truth and it's only a matter of time before someone gets the key to Pia's box!

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  9. It is hard to concentrate on the box problem when Lt. Columbo is investigating the tragic murder of Myra. I am sure that with him on the case the murder will be solved soon.

    I am going to say that in the box is Pis's album titled Pia.

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  10. In a private email, Pia says "Please to tell the guys to look closely for a HIDDEN CLUE at the end of the post! I do so want to open my box for some lucky feller!"

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  11. I'll take a semi-educated stab at this. How bout, Not the Freeze by a little known group, Penny Arkade?

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  12. Well, my hearing may be fading, but I am reading between the lines. Is it Wings at the Speed of Sound?

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  13. Jack Kerouac's CatMarch 14, 2020 at 7:11 AM

    In the stage production of "The Diary of Anne Frank" with Pia Zadora in the title role, [no, really] when the Germans showed up, looking for Anne, the audience started shouting "She's upstairs! She's upstairs!"

    Truly, an unforgettable actress.

    Now if you'll excuse me I have some gambling to do down in my old Kentucky home.

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    Replies
    1. Wily, cunning old JKC leaves a CLUE dangling on that old Kentucky breeze for youse ...

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  14. The 13 yr old boy in me says "Drippin' Wet" by Wet Willie.

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    Replies
    1. And the thirteen year-old boy in you is as wrong as he was when you were thirteen.

      For shame, pmac.

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    2. But, I bet you looked it up on Spotify!

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    3. Didn't need to - who can forget that cover? - and anyhoo, we don't gots Spotify out here on the perimeter, where there are no stars.

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    4. Little bit of Pmac trivia - I was at that concert. They opened for the Allman Bros Band that night at The Warehouse.

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  15. is it........ Bread?

    obey-gravity

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  16. The answer is of course: Kentucky Gambler, by Robey, Falk, & Bod!

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    Replies
    1. It's almost spooky - what are the chances of guessing it right? But you did, Bob! And that should give hope to the little guy in the street, th' workin' stiff, th' slob slingin' hash to make an honest buck!

      When I get around to it - I need my mid-morning nap right now - I'll up this and the Iguana album, as an extry bonus.

      Delete
    2. Surely to Open The Box, one had to Take Your Pick! with Michael Miles - for U.K. only guys of a certain vintage

      Yours aye
      JJWombat

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  17. My ISP is suffering from coronavirus.

    A couple of beautiful albums by approximately the same band. Great songs, singing, and playing.

    Not sure about the upload - there appears to be two archives which are the same - download one only.

    Complete fabness here.

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  18. Thank goodness it wasn't the severed head of my betrothed. I was getting worried there for a while and running around my house yelling "WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!!?!!?!?!!! WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!!?!!?!!?!!"

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  19. I'm clueless as to the clue or how anyone could guess that album. Then again, I don't know these dudes at all but as ever much appreciate broadening my horizon.

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  20. One must learn the essence of Pia Zadora and discern what her tastes would be. It's all quite simple, and perfectly obvious to the most casual observation.

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    Replies
    1. Nicely phrased, Bob. It should be apparent to even the meanest intelligence that country rock would be her favorite genre. Narrowing the field down through a process of logical reductivism one arrives ineluctably at the albums in question.

      Also, having the fucking answer actually typed out at the end of the piece is kind of a fallback.

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    2. I used my mystical and borderline divine way, to ascertain which album Pia would listen to.

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  21. An interesting object lesson in the power of marketing: When the Iguana album came out on a minuscule label (selfpublished?) it had that butt-ugly grey cover it's tagged with, which doesn't represent the music within particularly well. When it was reissued (and issued in the UK) three years later, it featured a super glossy cover with the band running on a beach (check it out on Discogs), so as to look more like the Doobie Brothers and profit from the rise of what we now call yacht rock.

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