If It's Thursday, It's The Saturday Slugfest! Dept.
Today's cagefight card is filled by simpering sisters Shirley & Dolly Collins bellying up against Monsters Of Röck Motörhead. Before you place your bets, though, leave us listen in to the pre-bout psyching-out session at the weigh-in. The winsome warblers together weighed in at 200lb, while Lemmy Out Of Motörhead tipped the scales at 180lb, so it looks like the duo have a slight weight advantage over the warty bass-botherer.
S&DC: With a hey nonny-no, and a trilly-rilly-dee ...
LOOM: SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCHES!
S&DC: O the lark she sings in the morning-o ...
LOOM: FUCK YOU!
S&DC: With a rilly-down-dilly-down, all the way from Nottamun Town!
LOOM: OI! CUNTS! SUCK MY SMELLY BALL-BAG!
S&DC: O my love he wears a ribbon in his hair ...
LOOM: 'E'S A FUCKIN' POOF THEN INNE!
S&DC: With a fol-de-rol-de-
LOOM: RIGHT! YOU ARE FUCKIN' DEAD! SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Place your bets in the comments. If you need to hear any of this stuff before you throw your money away, let me know.
My money's on Shirley & Dolly, handled by Texan Alan Lomax (and you don't fuck with Texas). Dolly will fake a left hook, while old Shirley gives Lemmy a right to his solar plexus causing him to fall down....have a coughing fit....not being able to get up, "Fast" Eddie throws in the towel.
ReplyDeleteShirley & Dolly in two rounds.
Can we hope that all 3 take each other out?!? Please?!?
ReplyDeleteIMPORTANT NOTICE
ReplyDeleteIT HAS COME TO THE ATTENTION OF THIS DEPARTMENT THAT MANY UNSOLICITED ONTERATORS ARE TRAMING ON THE PERMIS OF THE DERIALTOR.
FURTHER EMICATIONS WILL RESULT IN THE IMMEDIATE CONTORITY AND DERUNDMENT OF EACH AND EVERY SARMENSANT INCAVRELATED.
Mr. In Vancouver? The Doctor will see you now. To the left, through the rubber doors ...
DeleteMy money's on Lemmy! He's proven himself indestructible so far and as long as he's got enough pookie to keep him going there's no stopping him!
ReplyDeleteNow I'm confused. Wasn't Lemmy vs Stanley Unwin supposed to be on Monday?
ReplyDeleteLemmy is toast. Shirley & Dolly have more than their body weight on him; they have thousands of years of cultural history on their side.
ReplyDeleteLemmy does have better bass, though.
I'm not going to the effort of troweling this paste onto the walls unless someone actually wants to hear either. I'm with pmac here, betting on the mutually assured destruction of equal opposites. So far Shirley and Dolly are in the lead, although I'm watching through my fingers.
ReplyDeleteBut, I've already judged the books by their respective covers...(sleeve art)
ReplyDeleteAnd it was a 'draw'. It wasn't the least bit punny, either(oar)!
So the tree might have fallen but nobody was their to hear it.
So if it was dark...I wasn't there to see it!
But it fell just the same.
A transcendental figure without resolution...like the last piece of pi!
I'm still hoping for the Lee Van Cleef, Eastwood, Wallach ending. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PgAKzmWmuk
ReplyDeleteOr, even better: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLXerVcygWc
ReplyDeleteThe Collins girls. This album's the lodestone for those of us in Englandshire. Add in Ashley Hutchings (Mister Shirley) and you've got the Royal Family of Folk.
ReplyDeleteWe can see Englandshire drifting away toward America from where I live, provided we chose position on some suitable promonitory, like a high-rise office-block or the like.
DeleteScotland is already breaking off, as England and Wales are rounding the Irish Obstacle.
Is there a referee judging the game?
ReplyDeleteThen why isn't the guy mentioned?
Or is he a she?
Well, I'm very surprised at Mr Lemmy's sweary introduction (I expected a "Fuck You!", but not much more) I recon the Collins girls would be so annoyed, they would insert a crumhorn or bassoon up his bum (that's ass in the US).
ReplyDeleteAs a side note, Motorhead were one of the first bands I saw, in 1978 (Bomber tour) they were fantastic, but I don't play their music much these days. Recently have been listening to Shirley & Dolly a lot - that's maturity for you - maybe?.
I hope your enthusiasm for the fol-de-rol-de-nonny-down music encourages someone to ask for it - but it doesn't look likely right now. Still - they won.
DeleteOh, I missed that. I've got Anthems, and would recommend it, though I think many people would find their voices and some of the instrumentation a little challenging.
DeleteThanks for keeping it fun on the Island, Farq, all the very best from the UK.
Been a big fan of the hey-nonny-no for many years, especially since discovering Shirley Collins and the Albion Band's peerless No Roses album back in 1971 or 72. As they say, if you like that sort of thing, this is the sort of thing you'll like! Mind you, I do like a bit of Lemmy now and then too - no point in putting a limit on your enjoyment, is there? The Head Cat/Lemmy, Slim Jim and Danny B stuff is a whole lot of fun out past the familiar Motorhead territory.
DeleteOh, and before I forget - I don't have Anthems in Eden. Could I have a link please? Obliged to ya.
Many thanks, Farquhar. But I'm obliged to provide a password. Tightening up security on th' Isle o' Foam?
DeleteSorry 'bout that. I'd had the RAR file on my hard drive for a long time, couldn't work up the courage to listen to it, and forgot about the password. So here it is again. Right .... HERE.
Deletethe intrigue thickens as usual. Enter Password:________ or not....Perhaps utz tuts suts...no......blancemange.........chachanegas......snomaph........
ReplyDeleteSee previous comment. You're a brave man. *shudder*
Delete