Mission Statement: to do very little, for very few, for not very long. Disappointing the easily pleased since 1819. Not as good as it used to be from Day One. History is Bunk - PT Barnum. Artificially Intelligent before it was fashionable. Fat camp for the mind! Nothing lasts, but nothing is lost. The Shock of the Old! Often bettered, never imitated.
Tuesday, December 21, 2021
Holiday Music Dept.
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To qualify for this fabulousness, write a letter to Santa, tell him want you want.
ReplyDeleteMy hair back.
DeleteDear Santa,
ReplyDeleteWould you fetch me my Fifty Foot Hose version of 'God Bless The Child' from it's special place in the garage?
Uh....the Fifty Foot Hose version is pretty good. Too many synthesizer farts floating around the mix, but it's a decent take on the song.
DeleteWhat I want for Xmas? To spend a week at the Imperial, Koh Samui with Kreemé. Any chance you can fix it up for me Farquhar, my good man?
ReplyDeleteI can personally guarantee you will find the Girl Of Your Dreams loitering outside the NEP after midnight. She will tell you you're handsome, and you'll believe it.
DeleteBut hey - why am I telling you?
Dear santa,
ReplyDeleteI would dearly love some servo assisted breaks to fit one medium sized winged carrot. Once in place I might then have the time to listen to yet another record with or without extended bits.
Carrots Of Fire by Vangelis will be in your stocking.
DeleteJUMBLE 'that scramble word game'---anyone else hooked?
Delete[i been playing since a wee lad]
LISTEN SILENT TINSEL ENLIST INLETS
More a sudoku-type guy, me ... *cracks knucks*
DeleteWe're reminded of John Barth's definition of Language:
Delete-A couple dozen letters
Oh no, not another bloody record to listen to, you are a cruel santa.
ReplyDeletePeace on Earth? I'll settle for this Billie Holiday collection otherwise
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeletedarlingest santy baby,
I WANT BACK EVERY godDAMN FILE I'VE LOST FROM MY THOUSANDS OF FAILED EXTERNAL HARD DRIVES IN THE LAST 15 YEARS!!!
I can really relate to that...
DeleteLast year, you should have asked Old Saint Nick for a 5TB external hard drive.
Deletei did, and the stinkin' piece of crap failed. just like all the rest of them.
DeleteDear Santa,
ReplyDeleteIt's rumored that Mrs. Myra Nussbaum posed for a copy of Francisco Goya's painting of "The Naked Maja."
I want it for Christmas.
(Asking on behalf of a friend.)
UNSEE!
DeleteHappy holidays Farq! Sincerely, thank you for making a dark year much brighter. Happy holidays, or the best we can do, to one and all!
ReplyDeleteNever forget that right now you're older than you've ever been, and younger than you ever will be again.
DeleteDon't miss this. The rehearsal is magical.
ReplyDeleteDear Santa,
ReplyDeleteI better get them cha-cha heels.
(Too obscure of a pop-culture reference?)
Some Deccas
https://workupload.com/file/D7GW7a4rJnH
Many thanks for the Deccas.
DeleteIf Santa doesn't bring those shoes be sure to go on a family-killing rampage.
DeleteLove this and howzabout Santa cracks open a cold one witha coupla the boys & girls [not too mention the 4-5 Guys(tm)(r)(c)] and tells us what he's seen...
ReplyDeleteand thanks Babs--more fun for the end of the year here...
In a private email, Babs tells me she'll be working the pole at The Stinky Possum, Pork Bend N.D. for the holidays ("because that's where me fambly is") and she'll be back in the New Year.
DeleteI admire a working gal, though I believe it might be Great Bend, N.D., home of the North Dakota Pork Council--Marnell Ringsak's people, if memory serves. Our paths crossed in with Huron or Aberdeen, S.D.
DeleteYou're probably correct - Babs is tripping balls most of the time.
DeleteA stone goddess as far as I can tell; I am in awe.
DeleteDear Santa,
ReplyDeleteAll I want for Christmas is to crush my enemies, see them driven before me, and hear the lamentation of their women. Best wishes to you and Mrs. Claus.
Your pal,
DRaftervoi
This is a Christian wish, Mr Voi, and does you credit.
Deleteit does have a certain Old Testament ring to it...
DeleteThat's the kind of prayer a truly Christian god would be delighted to answer.
Delete