Jazz funk! Who sez it's just for guys? Not The Crusaders! And not us on th' Isle O'Foam©, by George! It's for everybody - and that includes the dames - who needs to eradicate irksome funk build-up from their facial pores!And as nine out of ten Epidermal Hygienists aver* there's nothing as effective as the smooth sound of The Crusaders for getting the funk out of your face!
Yes, subscribers, daily application of the featured albums will leave your face funk free, and that's a FoamGuarantee©! But that's not all! If you've been having trouble getting on down, you'll be floored by these swell recordings! Need a man to come in and do the popcorn? Simply download our five - count 'em - five - clinically approved albums and stand back from the stove!
*Study rubber-stamped by Dr. Snurdley Q. Axolotl M.D. [left - Ed.] at the FalseMemoryFoam© Laboratory Of Science. Offer void where prohibited by law or your Mom. Side effects may include but not be limited to catalepsy, Furshlugginer's Disease, death, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, mild dyspepsia, and the heartbreak of psoriasis. Consult your pharmacist if in doubt.
Our facial care package includes Chain Reaction, One, Hollywood, Those Southern Knights, and Free As The Wind.
ReplyDeleteWhat handsomeness regime do YOU follow? Embarrass yourelf with a a comment!
Shower once per week; brush teeth when Ms. Pmac complains about stench. Welcome to the quarantini.
ReplyDeleteShower once a week? Kudos! That's fastidious, dude!
DeleteI lead by example, Farq.
DeleteI recall first hearing The Crusaders (Put it Where You Want It), when the SLA held press conferences during the Hearst kidnapping saga. They played it in the background.
https://workupload.com/file/653Vq8JXYSQ gives you Southern Comfort. I prefer the Crusaders to the Jazz Crusaders, heresy though it is in some circles.
ReplyDeleteThanks Dave - I think pmac is probably getting someone to hold his beer!
DeleteHOLD MY BEER!!!!!! Derp!
DeleteI too subscribe to the pmac protocol for personal hygiene. I find that if I shower more than once a week, it disturbs the delicate ecosystem of my epidermis: the flora and fauna that inhabit the netherworld of my nether regions, and the hinterland of my hindmost.
ReplyDeleteI do allow my cat to exfoliate my face whenever she deems it necessary, which seems to coincide with those mornings when I'm least inclined to get up, get out of bed, and drag a comb across my head.
A cunning Stealth Link, almost unbelievably, is encypted in this very commet. But where? It's the puzzle craze that's sweeping the nation! Did you know that T.V.'s Alexandra Bastedo, star of the long-running show The Champions, is a keen fan of the game? Me neither.
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I went right for the obvious: "commet"... And my flight was at lite speed, too. Too bad it was a false foam alarm...
Deletethanking all the gods that may be that you're not providing digital scratch 'n sniff
ReplyDeleteIt Is Incredible Invisible
ReplyDeleteDon't give up - you're still in the running!
DeleteHygiene shmygiene. It's your taint, unless it ain't.
ReplyDeleteSadly, I am failing to live up to the high expectations I set for myself earlier today on tomorrow's post. And this being my honorary birthday post no less! If you happen to read this comment before the comment I made earlier today on tomorrow's post, just pretend it's something insightful and thought-provoking. A "doozy" as it were.
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