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| Foam-O-Fone© - Television for the blind! |
Many of youse bums will remember our Best O' Th' Year roundup hosted by the Elderly Lesbians! I persuaded Gertrude and Irma to contribute more to satisfy their fanbase here on th' IoF©. We spoke via Foam-O-Fone™yestiddy.
FT3 Heyyy gals! Lookin' svelte and sassy!
Irma Flattery will get you nowhere, young man.
FT3 Not you - me. You guys look like shit.
Gertrude We still look hot to each other.
FT3 The magic of cataracts. You chose a couple albums there. Filling The Gap, Gertie?
Irma That's her speciality!
Gertrude (sing-song) Mommy's got her paddle! Smacky-smacky!
FT3 So, Irma - Psychedelic Disaster Wheel?
Irma You'll have the expanded CD version, but I prefer vinyl.
Gertrude We like vinyl.
Irma Strap you on, bitch.
Gertrude Consarn it, you made me spit my bridgework again. Right in the chamber pot.
FT3 (loud cough) So what made you choose these comps over better-known examples in the field?
Irma Mommy's dirty girl likes it in the field, doesn't she?
Gertrude You're adding moisture to my oyster ...
At this point the signal from the Sisters Of Discipline Home For Sapphic Seniors was lost. Luckily, copies of their album choices are held in th' Vault O' Foam® should youse bums be desirous.
Nothing like a little girl-on-girl action for Friday nite!
ReplyDeleteTo qualify for these recondite recorded repositories of rock n' roll, simply do ten push-ups, or ten crunches, or crack your knuckles. State which.
can't do none of them anymore howza bout I just get out of mah chair?
DeleteDoes laying in bed picking my toenails count? That's about as much as I can muster right now (so tip of the hat to Rick whose demonstrating considerable more moxie and vitality).
ReplyDeleteI'm going to need to try that "adding moisture to the oyster" line on the ladies!
It'll get you inside their adult diaper quicker than you can say Werther's Originals!
DeleteHow unPC, irreverent, and misguided! Love it. More more more. Encore!
ReplyDeleteOh, I don't know. I'm pretty sure lesbians do get old, and probably still have the hots for each other. Good for Irma and Gertrude!
DeleteIf'n it tweren't 4 Elderly Lesbians pickin' out my Psych Comps, how'd I know where to start?
ReplyDeleteI can touch someone's nose with my tongue.
ReplyDeleteDo wall push-ups count? And yes, they are a thing.
ReplyDeleteIrma and Gertrude - always getting in a flap, aren't they?
ReplyDeletehey I actually just did the ten push ups! What? Am I crazy? I could have just lied! But I do feel more integrity doing it this way. Is integrity really a thing anymore?
ReplyDeleteIrma and Gertie are on the money with these two - they're swell comps. Of course, there's shit in the shinola, so use yer sieve. Filling The Gap, at the time, was unique in having really obscure stuff from bands that weren't so obscure. Psychedelic Disaster Wheel was the product of deranged minds and all the better for it, although Irma's vinyl might suit you better, so rinse and repeat.
ReplyDeletehttps://workupload.com/file/vjaYAns4XCT
This cheeky little number of a post really needs to get with the programme and embrace even greater diversity -
ReplyDeletehttp://menwholooklikeoldlesbians.blogspot.com/
Particularly fond of this: "Jeff Beck and Eric Clapton. Musicians, guitar gods (goddesses?) on the cover of magazine for seniors." - *snork*!
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