Don't Close The Blinds! - The Susanna Hoffs Interview

There's a school of thought that maintains The Bangles were the last great true pop group. If we leave aside the "girl group" thing, Bananarama don't count. They had less credibility, and much less talent, than The Archies, never mind The Bangles. But The Bangles were not only real musicians in a real band - they had huge, world-wide pop hits. And the greatest hit of them all - the swoonsome Eternal Flame - was written by them. Well, one of them. The one everyone fancies like hell. Not that the others aren't fanciable. Or talented or whatever. It's just that, well, Ms. Hoffs ... uhhh ... be right back.

Where were we? Oh - Susanna Hoffs. Oh, Susanna! Did ever anyone, ever, in the history of anything, wear a Rickenbacker as well as she did? Mmm. Sorry - getting distracted here. Be right back.

O-kayyyy! She also had and still has a thriving, though not quite Eternal Flame-rekindling, solo career. And she recorded a solo album that never got released,

Who's driving the car?

which isn't exactly hard to find in the seething souk of illicit contraband that is the internet, but here it is for those that missed it. I've also added the Live At The Ritz boot from '84, which shows what a deliriously exciting band they were live. Kick arse, in fact!

During the giddy hey-day of Eternal Flame, when I was coincidentally renting a dumpster apartment across the street from Ms. Hoffs' LA home, I was lucky enough to secure a personal interview with her by telephone, a transcription of which follows:

SH: Who is this?
FMF: [breathing]
SH: Hello?
FMF: [breathing heavily]
SH: Is this the creep that stole my laundry?
FMF: [breathing faster]
SH: I'm calling the cops on you, you freak! [slams phone down]
FMF: [into dead line] DON'T CLOSE THE BLINDS!
[siren in distance]