Studio 12 was on Magnolia Blvd at Vineland I think was the cross street. At that corner were two liquor stores (if I was relying on repeat business I would have located my rehab center right there and gone Liberace on the place with 200 bucks or so to lavish on the two car garage where we all lived.). It was the summer solstice that night and there's bad traffic on Sherman Way and other majors so Magnolia Street is backed up, assholes honking. I was out by the pool with Tex Mosely from the Hangmen, chain smoking Gauloise Blondes and drinking horrible chicory coffee. Sufferin' like a fool. We start hearing this fucking banshee wailing intermingled with the car horns and then also realized (being sober is so fucking weird, I can't believe people pay money to feel this way) that the cars seem to be honking at our fucking house. We, poor Tex and I, hobbled up in that refreshing brand new unjunkie wobble, to ascertain the situation and perhaps take in some carnage. Carne, we didn't expect!!!
Fucking Dennis Hopper is buck naked up a fucking palm tree twenty feet off the ground with a half empty magnum of Maker's Mark howling at the fucking moon and shaking his forlorn wedding tackle at passersby. I never realized or fully appreciated how many convertibles were running around with like awesome Latinas in their big shades.....laughing their asses off and if, if, if you ever met them, your face they'll never forget. Tex and I flashed on that and realized we were through. Just ruined. We split rehab and got high a couple of days later. Your punishment was a night out!!!! No visitors, no chicks....that's a high success rate right there. In fact, we wuz ruminatin' just the other day about what we could do for some of society's more unfortunate creatures (trust me, right this moment I'm destroyed, wrecked, but I just smile a lot), celebrities, artists, musicians, televangelists, alien sex fiends...everyone knows them... and we thought our club, (working name here), could provide specialty rehab to dishonest people. It'd have to be in Nevada or a, dare I say, private island somewhere. Strip clubs, the real whores - congress, check it out, like a tenner to lap dance with Pelosi...curdles the old chutney dunnit? A full service bar. Hot and cold running gov't milf attendants. Myra would have loved it. And Carlos, her little dog too.
As ever, FiveGuns sweeps us off into th' hinterlands, not only of LA (pronounced with a hard G for authenticity), but of consciousness its ownself. He lives on "the fractal fringe of the fun zone" - a phrase which may resonate - across the tracks from Kwai Chang, downriver from Delta Del's narrowboat, a block away from the banks of the mighty Mekong, and a stone's throw as the crow flies from where you hang your hat, dear reader.
ReplyDeleteMay we all meet up in the sweet by and by ...
What-ho, what-ho, what-ho! Asshole's honking, you say? Put an end to that with Beano (roll into cylindrical shape to shove right up Slowhand's jacksie): https://i.scdn.co/image/ab67616d0000b273c40ff56a16cebb8f30af1f66.
ReplyDeleteLOL...........as far as it goes.....one of the best pics of the old wanker.
DeleteHuh. Uh-Huh. O-kayyyyyyyyyyyy.
ReplyDeleteIn many ways, OBG speaks for all of us. Not in the accent we'd choose, but hey.
DeleteA lot of Latino autobody painters want to work for minimum...........good on them but somehow it always fails. I come from the school of the blind painter. Top that. I can phone him anytime for the formula to mix anything. Being good at bondo works until....it doesn't. I spent a decade doing historic preservation to get to this point. Bite me.
DeleteNobody's trying to put you down FGW, but nobody (I'm guessing) wants to bite you, much.
DeleteYears later, Keith Richards would attempt to replicate Dennis Hopper's coconut tree stunt with disastrous results. Keef being Keef, he survives with his faculties (?) intact (???). A ripping yarn, 5GW!
ReplyDeleteThank you jonder! And thank you all, more or less....lol. Nice words Farq. May I use your words as an endorsement?
ReplyDeleteThat's some fine company you keep! Thoroughly entertaining narcotic fever dream -- Your club sounds just fine and I'm sure it's just visible there on the horizon from this here island retreat of degenerates but I'll pass on the $10 lap dance from Pelosi unless it's a choice of her or Marjory Taylor Green. How about AOC instead? Thank you MISTER Screen Painter (you've earned the honorific now!)
ReplyDeleteerrr "Set Painter" I mean; doh!
Delete500 a day without overtime. You got better MrDave............what are you sayin' exactly. I did the Little Mermaid and all that shit. Some days I made 1800 bucks if I was mixing paint colors without overtime. What you got MrDave?
DeleteSorry, FGW, wires crossed -- was honestly giving you kudos and props here as well as trying to make up for coming off as an ass on the last post where I was attempting to josh around in a friendly manner. "Set Painter" is in quotes as a correction to "Screen Painter" not to demean it any way -- I really meant "respect!" when I said it in the other post and I still do. So anyway, I dig your post here, I think that Dis-topian movie and your work on it looks and sounds dope as hell, and I consider you a friendly on this island. Sorry again if it seemed otherwise!
DeleteThanks, MrDave. I know you're a sweetheart. FGW is a wild card, much treasured, but with that edge comes a little (unnecessary) uncertainty.
DeleteDoes kind of curdle the chutney, Uh huh.
ReplyDeleteAnd here I was, just reading up on Roger Corman and BLAM! (as if fired by one of five guns west) - another cool user name has its origins...maybe.
ReplyDelete