Delta Del Dept. - The Slop Done Rose To Th' Top

Delta Del (at right) ponders solecism inherent in concept of time expressed as linear intervals. Legacy Foam-O-Graph© - "pearls for swine!™"

Greetings Islanders! Delta Del here with another educational blues-related piece. Having explored the previously unknown genre of Free Blues, I now turn my attention to the little-understood phenomenon of Semi-Sloppiness. Regular Island visitors may recall mention in a recent T-Bone Walker comments section of “semi-sloppy” guitar playing. But what is it? A force for good, or a lazy mess born of ignorance and intoxication? And either way, where can I get me some?

When I told Farq that I was planning this piece, he cautioned against the project [no he didn't - Ed.], telling me that in attempting to dissect and analyse semi-sloppiness I would be messin with forces that I don't understand. I’d be trying to shove a strange-beautiful vibe into a killing jar and pin it down in a display case in the Island museum. I’d be shooting an endangered species just so I can paint it accurately. Jeez Farq, says I, back off with the heavy analogies willya? Of course Farq was not aware that my training as a Free Blues Advocate-Practitioner included a Semi-Sloppin' module, so I had already devoted many hours of research and study to this subject (and seventeen sheets of hand-written A4, the narrow-lined stuff, with illustrations, laminated, in a nice binder). It certainly shook up my thoughts about guitar playing, and the slop done rose to the top.

As a Free Blues guitarist, I hate precision unless its written on my bassman’s Fender. For slop-heads like me, accurate is never the point, but try telling that to the plague of tribute bands. And flawless is a bore. A recording engineer of some repute, tired of a steady flow of perfectly competent music college graduates, once told me that the way an unschooled player’s limitations shape their music makes them a much more interesting listen, and challenge, for a pro like him. I hit the tattoo place next door to the studio, and since that fateful day my bared chest informs the world that “My Limitations Make Me Interesting”. It does also state that “Del luvs Claire & Claire luvs Del” but alas the second part of that one ceased to apply in September 1982. She left while I was temporarily unconscious, but not before using an indelible marker pen to change “Interesting” to “Intolerable”.

But of course the ability to play in a semi-sloppy style and have it sound NATURAL and RIGHT is not a limitation, it is a superpower. I don't claim to have that power, but I have aspired to it, glimpsed it, perhaps even grasped it briefly on occasion. But the really cool thing about semi-sloppin … even after 50 years, seventeen pages and a nice binder, I still don’t know what it is. Which is why I’m instigating a survey, sure to be useful in my PhD thesis, among the 4or5 Island regulars. There follows a questionnaire to which interested parties should respond via the comments section.

QUESTION 1
Semi-slop washed up on the Island via Eric’s comment on T-Bone Walker (Hi Eric!). Farq’s reply cited Jimi. What other artists are on the list of semi-sloppers? Any bands loaded with semi-slop players? This doesn’t have to be restricted to blues-type guitarists. And who among us knows enough about jazz to tell me what the slop is goin on with Monk?

QUESTION 2
Is semi-sloppin all about timing and time-keeping? Is it exclusively a groove thing? Is there a connection between semi-sloppin and an African sense of timing? Does that sense form the basis of an African-American version audible in the work of T-Bone and Monk? The swing factor? The teasing of the one? Which one? The Other One?

QUESTION 3
Yes what about them Whiteboys? Are the Dead jammin up a slop or not? Keef … perma-stoned or slop chops finely honed? Them Feats … so tight yet somehow so loose? How is such a contradiction possible and is it true semi-slop?

QUESTION 4
What’s geography got to do with it? Does Louisiana’s groovy gumbo make it your favourite one-stop slop-shop?

QUESTION 5
What’s technology got to do with it? Do those accusing Jimi of being a sloppy player ever stop for just a single second to appreciate his control of high volume amps, early unpredictable effects units and wild feedback? No. Oooh what a messy riff that was! Aha he came in a millisecond late on that change! You people, honestly.

QUESTION 6
Where was I? Oh yes, is it possible to construct a version of semi-sloppy via tightly written and arranged parts that play around with time signatures and create unexpected phrase shapes? Can clever clogs cook up a fully-fake semi-slop?

QUESTION 7
Does anybody really think semi-sloppin is just lazy, sub-standard players who should knuckle down and practice until they have erased this defect from their playing? If so, see me afterwards. Outside.

No conferring please. Mobile phones must be switched off. Your time started a while back, and it will be all over before you know it. Hand your completed answers in to the comments section and leave quietly.

And by the way, when I submitted my initial outline for this piece to Ed. (mid 40’s my ass) he was reluctant to give the OK. He referred the matter to Farq (mid 50’s my ass), or Mr Throckmorton, Sir as Farq insists on being addressed by his staff. Farq didn’t seem terribly keen (killing jars, endangered species etc.) so I whipped out my Semi-Sloppin module binder. Here Farq, says I, check out this nice binder. He thumbed through a few pages, muttered an appreciative mm ... laminated as he fingered a striking full-page portrait of Claudia Lennear [left - Ed.], grunted a grudging “OK go for it”, and turned his attention back to his latest Foam-O-Graph©, which appeared to involve Bob Ross body-painting a log cabin (with fir trees) on Myra’s wrinkled folds. I hope he will concede that he made the right decision in okaying this piece. We must all hope that his decisions concerning Foam-O-Graphs© will eventually improve.