Merrell Fankhauser's Mystic Clam Of Mu Dept.

In my wanderings in search of the strange, the weird, and the unearthly, the story of Merrell Fankhauser's Mystic Clam Of Mu ranks as one of the strangest, the weirdest, and the unearthliest [is this a word? - Ed.].  Come with me now into the realms of the strange, the weird, and the unearthly, as I recount a tale so strange, so weird, so unearthly I would scarcely give it creedence were it not for the fact I witnessed it with my own eyes! Kindly wishes, Your Host, Farquhar Throckmorton III

 

 

Lancelot "Lance" Steele was born in 1943 to Charles and Elizabeth Steele, respectively Professor Emeritus of Classical Literature at Yale, and first viola with the New York Philharmonic. As a young teen Lance developed a passion for rock and roll, but when he told his parents he wanted to quit high school to devote himself to his band Lancelot And The Knights, they would only allow it on one condition; he must change his name. Neither wanted the respected Steele family name associated with such a "transient vulgar fad".

Stately Steele Manor

With a mischievous sense of humor, his parents wrote unlikely names on slips of paper and asked young Lance to choose one from a top hat. The result, Merrell Fankhauser, should have been ridiculous enough to make him give up any idea of becoming a rock and roll star, but if anything it strengthened his resolve. The Impacts, once Lancelot And The Knights, now Merrell And The Exiles, moved to California where their wholesome good looks and happening teenbeat sounds soon garnered them a residency at prestigious Pismo Beach teen hangout The Clam House [later demolished to make way for MrDave's Fish Head Incinerator - Ed.].

From here, the story takes an almost unbelievable turn. In an interview with The Pismo Persuader, Merrell recounts the event that would change his life:

"We were taking a break from filming a scene for the new Fabian movie Teen Clambake From Mars, and I was walking along the oceanside when a giant glowing clam descended from the sky and spoke to me. It said Merrell, do some drugs, which to be honest I already was, but also Merrell, return to the lost continent of Mu, which I never heard of. And this glowing book like floated down from the clam, which had disappeared, and there it was on the sand next to a Thermos and a pair of huaraches. And a towel. The book [left - Ed.] felt strangely warm, like it fell out a glowing clam. I took it back to the movie set where I read it while Fabian learned his line, which was, gee whiz is this clam ever salty!" 

The rest is history. Fabian became a lush and married a Bituminious Coal Queen. The Exiles changed their name to Fapardokly, a Muvian deity, and two of the band members changed their names to Drumbo and Antennae Jimmy Semens. They cut a half-assed album before changing their name to Merrell Fankhauser And His Trusty HMS Bounty and cutting a swell album before moving to Maui and changing their name to Mu and cutting a swell album which like the lost continent itself sank without trace, only to wash up decades later on Fabulous False Memory Foam Island©!

 

What have these albums in common?

 

... read the comments for the astonishing answer!

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