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Meet Chyron Touchepas! Highly qualified and well-respected in competitive world of Fine Art, Chyron [19 my ass - Ed.] is latest professional appointee to join team at (fabulous) False Memory Foam© Island! Shown here [above - Ed.] at our fabulous Gallery Of Art Pictures Gallery! Note original oil painting of "blog" header in pride of place! Note swell real paintings from around world what adorn walls! Note sleeping guard meeting strenuous job requirements! Note polished hardwood floor from at-risk rainforest timber! Note keen student of Art pitchers Alfred E. Neuman soaking up Culture! Did we forget anything noteworthy? What's that you say? Her? Who her? Hoo hah! Why - that's our new Art Historian Consultant And Executive Curator, ya doofus! What's that you say? Her favorite album? Leave us ax her!
FMF©: Say, Chyron, which Th' Four Or Five Guys© want to know is what your favorite album is?
CT: No, they do not. They are only interested in my young, clean-limbed body.
FMF©: Are you into Beefheart? How do you rate Strictly Personal?
CT: Men! They only desire one thing! To experience the wild ecstasy of my passion! To have my tight body writhe naked beneath them, moist and lightly-muscled! To me, nothing is perverted, nothing forbidden. Men lust for me with unquenchable ardor, driven to madness by the knowledge they can never possess me! They are fools!
FMF©: I like the phasing, myself. The original tracks, first released on the I May Be Hungry comp. sound a little, I dunno, dull? In comparison? Thoughts?
CT: I can never obtain physical satisfaction from a mere man. I live only for the sterile langor of a sapphic embrace. There is nothing more truly erotic and beautiful than the lesbian experience, especially with me.
FMF©: Well, thanks for joining this musical discussion, Chyron! I'm sure th' Four Or Five Guys© look forward to further topics with you, and welcome to the Isle O'Foam©!
CT: I need an assistant. Now. Have Kreemé bring a quart of silicone lube to my room.
Join th' conversation! Does that phasing work for you?
THIS JUST IN ROLLING NEWS: Chyron reveals centerpiece IoF© oil painting is fake!
The phasing did/does work for me, but the original tracks aren't too shabby. I do recall (sorta) listening to Kandy Korn (the long version that appeared on the Mirror Man album)while stoned on "white mescaline" enjoying the phasing that resulted as well. OK, back to the shelter...
ReplyDeleteWhat the world needs now is a remaster of the original album from the original tapes, which it's yet to get. I imagine it's down to label/rights issues, what with it being on Blue Thumb, but it's the Big Missing Album in his oeuvre [Fr. - egg - Ed.] to get a spiffy reissue treatment. I have a couple of audiphile rips from vinyl, but they don't sound quite there yet. I tweaked my files in Audacity to wake them up a bit, and that's the version I listen to.
DeleteA nice deluxe reissue would be just what the doctor ordered.
ReplyDeleteI'm indifferent to the phasing. Meh.
Does Kreemé [19 my ass - Ed.] bat for both teams?
Phasing is nearly always derided for being a psychedelic cliché, but few albums feature it to any extent. I think it's really groovy. Big fan. The story everyone knows is that Bob Krasnow added the effect without Van Vliet knowing, and he hated it. But there are also reports of his liking it. So anyway. I much prefer the album to Decals.
Delete(Kreemé: "Ew?")
I disagree in general with production decisions that are contrary to what the artist wants, but I'm OK with the phasing.
ReplyDeleteNice gallery!
Well,
ReplyDeleteOn an imaginary parallel...
Jimi Hendrix is one of the few guitarist that should have been allowed to own a wah-wah pedal.
Chyron is completely unknown to me.
Phasing or phrasing?
Heimlich Maneuver or Hymen Hug?
And Frank Zappa. And Wah Wah Watson. And Harvey Mandel. And Mac Gayden.
DeleteAnd Ron Ashton! Few things, maybe nothing, give me the tinglies like the first track of the first Stooges album (1969). "W'allright ..."
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ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author, too!
DeleteNice gallery indeed. And was the above photograph taken at Coughton Court the English Tudor country house, situated on the main road between Studley and Alcester in Warwickshire, UK ? The reason I ask is I just watched BBC's Flog it programme filmed at the Throckmorton ancestral family home. I kid you not. No wonder Farq can afford his own island (with glamorous assistants), the family home looks great.
ReplyDeleteThe house has a long crenellated façade directly facing the main road, at the centre of which is the Tudor Gatehouse, dating from after 1536; this has hexagonal turrets and oriel windows in the English Renaissance style. The Gatehouse is the oldest part of the house and is flanked by later wings, in the Strawberry Hill Gothic style, popularised by Horace Walpole.
Cut and paste courtesy of wikipedia.
Hilarious and not hilarious!
DeleteI loved the series called Midsomer Murders! The location scout for the show is a champ.
It makes me think that pedigree is secondary to architectural design,
No wonder everyone names their abode over there.
Apparently the Welsh had no say in the names...
(Oh well! Can't have everything)
Provenance...a distant 3rd in the running!
Farq wasn't mentioned in the programme for some reason.
DeleteThe house was used as a filming location for the BBC One series Father Brown in the episode The Mask of the Demon.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coughton_Court
On Midsomer Murders it's all about who lives in the big house. The Manor. Some of those structures are hundreds of years old. You can practically count the number of remodel jobs have occurred by counting the different kinds of stone in the masonry work. The interiors are especially beautiful with exposed beams, lintels, braces, mantels...all pre-dating saw mills. The more modern buildings have taller ceilings and doors and elaborate moulding work... And, I am speechless when I see the cathedrals and abbeys sporting 30' high intersecting barrel arches all made of stone (?). I was watching the show once and suddenly recognized a familiar image that I have known since 1970. It was the ancient water mill pictured on the debut album by Black Sabbath. It's called Maple Durham and was the location of episode 3, season 7...The Fisher King.
DeleteSo, Farq knows to steer clear of the location, location, location.
It is far too revealing, revealing, revealing.
That's why he knows so much about many things.
I often wonder if he plays the harpsichord!
(or cello).
Enough of all this Totleigh Towers stuff, which, if I recall correctly, was home to Sir Watkyn Bassett and his daughter, the overly sentimental Madeleine who, Bertie tells us, believes that the stars are God's daisy-chain. I don't know where the Throckmortons fit in - were they staff?
ReplyDeleteNo enough of this nonsense I say - what we really need to know is why Chyron appears to have a carabiner tucked into her waist band; is she off climbing somewhere? Would she like a fellow to top-rope for her? Just asking for a friend...
I like to pretend that I am on the maiden voyage of The Magic Christian with my adopted son, Youngman. After all, it's the social must of the season. Pedigree and provenance overtakes me when I see the original oil painting of the foam island blog header. There is only one such work of art in existence...and so whenever the mood is upon me, I must dine alone. No matter who Chyron is, her phrasing might as well be her phasing. We don't have beautiful architecture in America... but, we have plenty of fine wool. It all leads back to the manor k...or, the manner.
DeleteIs it her phrasing or her phasing.
That belt buckle must be hell on the guitar finish.
Respectfully, Sir...
Sorry to rant!
Here's an audiophile vinyl rip of Strictly Personal.
ReplyDeleteI recommend Boom 3D if you're playing music through your computer to desk speakers. The difference it makes is astonishing. You can tweak a very extensive graphic equaliser to make anything sound its best, to your own tastes, instantly. It's like doing your own remix. The "surround" set-up is a bit of a once-only novelty, as are the pre-sets, all you need is the equaliser (and the extra kick the amp gives). I got it from Pirate Bay (part of th' IoF©), because I'm broke, but it's worth paying for.
Chyron reports that the "original oil painting" of the header is in fact ... a fake! I paid a vagillion bucks for that!
ReplyDeleteI had a funny feeling she was French!
DeleteA fake?
Well, I'd be happy with a signed forgery.
Yes, I have no gallery, anyway!
Then, it's equally likely that the original is hidden beneath her cleavage/necklace/puka shell t-shirt breast plate...painted onto her skin.
What is she pointing at anyway?
One thing's for sure!
It ain't the way to Sotheby's!
(Thank you for the Boom 3D recommendation)
vagillion?!?
DeleteThat went right by me!
Very nice, Farq!
Well, this certainly explains the crisscross marks on your head.
ReplyDelete