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| The magnificent pipe organ at th' Foam-O-Drome© |
Bellying up to each other in the ring are The Mormon Tabernacle Choir, and Keith Hudson! Whom [grammar - Ed.] do you think will emerge victorious from th' Foam-O-Drome®, and whom [are you sure about this? - Ed.] will be stretchered away in a tsunami of boos and phlegm?
Study form below, place bets in comment - justify choice, else we think it's guesswork, ya lazy-ass bum. To the victor, not only the spoils (who wants spoils yet?) but Featured Album loaddown!
Mormon Tabernacle Choir: Two hundred Christian souls - number prescribed by the number of boils on Job's butt [Leviticus XVI, LSMFT - Ed.] - and every sphincter crimped on a Brigham Young™ Hickory Buttplug. At weigh-in: 52,000 lb. If they can get a punch together between them, they're looking good!
Keith Hudson: The Dark Prince of Reggae is just one guy, but he's stoned enough for a couple hundred. Tipping the scales at 190lb, and that's just his stash, Keith says confidently, "I and I victorious on Judgement Day."
EDIT: It was Hudson for the win (see comments). He awards his personal non-fungible digital iteration of Flesh Of My Skin to those who made the effort to place a bet. The rest of youse lazy-ass bums ain't eligible. G'wan- amscray!
If you enjoyed this post, please support Fabulous False Memory Foam© Island by patronising your local record store! Like this: "My! Aren't you a splendid little record store! Well done, little record store!"
We may, if we like, see this as a titanic battle between two totally batshit religions. I can see nothing to choose between them in terms of dogma, but if pressed I'd join the Rastas on account which they got herb and the best music. But comparative religion aside, this looks like a promising showdown, and the sheer force of numbers may not be enough for the portly white folks ...
ReplyDeleteJust got back from the ol' record store with some Bob Marley. I vote for the Rastas!
ReplyDeleteHe does refer to himself as "I and I" so the plural is correct.
DeleteRastas all the way. Christian choirs give me gas.
ReplyDeleteI'm worried about the Salt Lake suplex.
ReplyDeleteNot to mention, Mormon mat slam.
DeleteAlso, the Brigham Young Yeet.
DeleteEvery time I type LDS, autocorrect changes it to LSD, which is quite funny.
ReplyDeleteGetting 202 people in a 20-foot by 20-foot (6.096 m by 6.096 m) ring will be quite a feat.
Be that as it may
In my eye, the LDS are less trustworthy than Rastafarians. In fact, the LDS are equally dangerous as being a passenger in Vince Neil's car. Therefore, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir will cheat by punching after the bell, putting eye irritating ointment on their gloves, and other tricks they have under their robes.
In the first round, Keith Hudson will (as we say here in the Big Apple): "lose his shit" after he gets the irritating ointment in his eyes. When the first round ends, Keith, in his corner, attaches his Koutchie (not Dutchie) to a long chain. When the second round commences, Keith comes out swinging the Koutchie like Roy Rogers roping cattle on crystal meth, and take out the entire choir.
Keith Hudson in two rounds.
You win the ringside laurels, Babs! Read your comment after writing up the match, so you were spookiliy prescient. Koutchie-koutchie-koo!
DeleteDo we know if Hudson has hidden any weapons under the ring?
ReplyDeleteI don't trust these religious types, so there will be cheating.
ReplyDeleteAlso what with Hudsons massive reefer, and the Mormons incense sticks, visibility will be less than a meter, chaos will be the order of the day, by the end of the first round, Hudson will have left the ring to sit down with his pal Eek-a-mouse, allowing the Christians to do whatever they decide their god would like them to do according to their interpretation of the 'good book'.
Mormon Tabernacle Choir, given the win after Hudson went owol.
If it's muddy, I like the Moron Choir by 6 points. Come to think of it, I'll back the angel Bony Moroni against some spliff-sucking rastafarian any day.
ReplyDeleteQuality winning out over quantity in the comments section!
ReplyDeleteThe bout was over almost before it started. Hudson filled the ring with smoke, and as the portly warblers struggled to get through the ropes Hudson, in a surprise move, passed the dutchie from the left hand side and laid them out, one by one. The extent of the carnage was only visible when the smoke cleared, and by that time Hudson was on the Black Starliner for home.
Mr. Hudson kindly donates his personal mp3 copy of Flesh Of My Skin to reward those 4/5g© who could find the energy to tap out a comment with the rubber-tipped stick attached to their Woodstock© headband. The rest of youse lousy cheap nogood slobs have NO RIGHT to this link, and will invoke TH' CURSE 0' FOAM™ - today manifest as a forty per cent increase in dandruff flake size - on clicking it.
ReplyDeletehttps://workupload.com/file/VPpRBDZcFbb