Think you've seen this somewhere before? Well, ya ain't, wiseass, because Chyron Amuse-Gueule, our talented and popular Chief Executive Curator & Restorer here at th' IoF© Art Gallery O' Paintings, just finished restorin' it to its original Todd-AO Color® splendor!The original work is a pastiche [type of nut - Ed.] or hommage [Fr. cheese - Ed.] of the jungle paintings of Henri Rousseau, but the mystery is why the colors are so muddy and gray, completely unlike Rousseau's vibrant, primitivist palette [blow it out yer ass - Ed.]. It looks like a nightmare Hansel & Gretel trip to a nasty house in the forest. Sky is gray, foreboding. Foliage is colorless. *shudder* It's one creepy pitcher, is what it is. Why? Goddammit, why?
So I tasked Chyron with cleaning the original [left - Ed.] to reveal the intent of our anonymous artist, and the result is, well, astounding. You don't care. It is fondly to be hoped that this here Foam-O-Graph® [below- Ed.] of Ms. Chyron and her youthful assistant Kreemé [19 my ass - Ed.] will inculcate a latent passion for Fine Art restoration in your culturally crippled soul. Note original, depressing artwork on easel in background. Note hushed, professional atmosphere, latest hi-tech art equipment. Note only opportunity on internet to view Courbet's banned French-type painting The Origin Of The World, to which Chyron will be devoting her delicate attentions nextly! "I'm thinking depilation?" she breathed yesterday. "I'm always thinking depilation."
 |
©Foam-O-Graph Corp. "Doctor! My eyes!™"
|
The blank space below is for your notes - write directly on screen using indelible marker to keep your thoughts for future reference!
.
You're probably wondering why I gathered you all here today.
ReplyDeleteLOVE the Peanuts reference. *chef's kiss*
DeleteI already revealed that Sting murdered Mrs. Myra Nussbaum. My work here is done.
ReplyDelete"In a low-cut blouse, she brings the beer
ReplyDeleteRousseau paints a jungle flower behind her ear
Those cannibals of shuck and jive
They'll eat a working girl like her alive"
Speaking of which: is there a video of Kreemé [19 my ass] strapped in the harness, while Chyron Amuse-Gueule tells her what a naughty girl she is, and hands out the appropriate punishment?
Asking for a friend, no really.
*checks room, leans in* There ... might be ...
DeleteSpeaking of wilderness, the gallery has undergone an upgrade...
ReplyDeleteyou know, modern decor. It looks like the restaurant AND the Casbah from Naked Lunch. NO PUNch intended. Where is the typewriter?
In the words of "Uncle Buck"
DeleteI only type every third night. I have no plan. My mind is a blank. I sit down. The typewriter gives me things I don't even know I'm working on. It's a free lunch. A free dinner. I don't know how long it is going to continue, but so far there is nothing easier than writing.
All work and no play makes Jack Kerouac's Cat a dull boy!
DeleteAddictions...
Deleteand their withdrawal symptoms can be so subtle...
Unless you know you're addicted!
I've got time for a hit...
I mean, if you were going to do one!
I find with fiction that the typewriter takes over.
DeleteThere is nothing finer...
Delete(or, more frightening)
than a typewriter on an ether binge!
Especially an old manual that defies the laws of thermodynamics.
Who stole my bug powder?
The object is to exterminate rational thought!
It's the final challenge of inspired fiction.
If you don't find a smile here then Farq's right, yer bums!!!
ReplyDeletehttp://forum.pinkrobert.net/viewforum.php?f=3&sid=e8f8a702c80c6bd7ea9bebf8ae0567ca
Thank 'ee! Loaddowning Mickboy Smile mix as we speak ...
DeleteSMiLE???
DeleteMickboy???
High smiles all around!
Thank you, Rob.
DeleteFierce link...
This post had me thinking to share this link regarding album art:
https://dsulpy.proboards.com/thread/12309/alternate-beatle-covers-updated?page=3
There are 19 pages of inspired artwork...mostly Beatles.
But the rest of the site is ALL Beatles, I think.
It's just that I wanted Farq to see that he is on top of his game.
Better than chess...graphic design!
Sicilian Defense? Maybe.
The Mickboy Mix is Meh.
DeleteI was under whelmed by MickBoy also but there's some great stuff lurking from other favorites...
Delete*cracks knuckles*
ReplyDeleteOkay - we're here for !THIS! - a surprise treat courtesy our great pal Tremolo. It's Nez. New Nez. Swell Nez!
Holy crap this is good!!!!!!
DeleteThe color wheel is relativity!
ReplyDeleteThat's what this lesson has taught me.
That original is pure frownland.
Thank you, Farq!
It's true that the original Smiley Smile cover is drab and uninviting. Hell, you take a picture like that in 1967, at least make it pop! I like the primary colors on your version, and yet, it's still lost on an album to which I never return, the worst in their run from Pet Sounds to Holland.
ReplyDeleteIt's a tossed-off twenty-minute album (once you take out the singles). It works as an anecdote, a snapshot, but the memory of the gut-punch of disappointment I felt on buying it ... and the really dumb thing is that Smile would have blown Pepper clear out of the water (still does, incomplete), and Brian's paranoia was just that. Still, I treasure the "clean slate" albums that followed, Friends and Wild Honey.
Delete"It's a tossed-off twenty-minute album"
DeleteYeah, exactly. What a freakin' rip off and then half of songs are...uh...uhm...not great.
So you get ten minutes or so of okay music plus the singles you already bought anyway. Yeah, the whole "LP as art" "All killers, no fillers" etc. didn't work for them Boys, even after Pet Sounds.
And Capitol had no qualms about sending out twenty-five minutes of music as a new album. It always makes me smile that for Holland plus it's EP they make a specific point to explain this makes up 1 1/2 LP sides. Running time: 48.29. Only at Capitol and chez les garçons de la plage is that one and a half LPs. Running time of, say King Crimson's "Lark's Tongues", issued two months later: 46.36.
But some of those Beach Boys albums of the 60s, man. Less than half an hour and still ripe with absolute filler like "Denny's Drums" or "Bull Session with Big Daddy". Bull, indeed.
As a side note, I also appreciate "Friends" (one of the shortest albums ever released, I would bet, but hey, it's mostly quality) and "Wild Honey"
By the way, is this a new running gag? The write-ups do one thing and the comments end up doing Monkee business and being the Nez.
ReplyDeleteI'd hate to think you ever found a rational M.O. for th' IoF©, Clar. Business as usual, I thought?
DeleteYou talkin' to me?
DeleteWell, I'm the only one here.
DeleteTrue, but a rational M.O. has never been anything I'd seek anywhere. Perhaps you mistook my good looks for One Buck Guy who commented a space up in this section.
DeleteGee, is my face ever red! I messed up, big time. I had ONE JOB, and ... *snurfle*! ... kin yez fergive me, Clar? Kin yez find it in yer heart tuh gimme 'nutha chance? Tuh make good? One chance! All I ax! I'm beggin' wit' dis! I'm on muh knees here! *sob*!
DeleteClarence...
Deletethat was the best De Niro I've ever seen!
I hear ya axin' and that baby aspirin dissolved in cola has made me not only noble, but forgiving.
Delete*chokes back sob, wipes nose with hand, blinks thu tears at rope of phlegm connecting face with thumb*
DeleteThanks for the Nez! His Movies of the Mind tour came to Cleveland a few years back. Nez played to a 1/3 filled auditorium, and most of these people wanted their Monkees memorabilia autographed. The band was tight and the music was all Nesmith. Most enjoyable
ReplyDeleteVariations of the fake pic in the back
ReplyDeletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6ev7Ld2_hA
What is the secret of her timeless allure? And, more importantly, why can't you make the two halves of the background join up in a single convincing landscape?
Delete