Friday, February 21, 2020

Mrs. Myra Nussbaum's Poolside Pick!

In a bold new initiative that proudly meets Millennial requirements for both diversity and body-positivism, Cody's grandma takes over bikini duties for the first - and maybe the last - Poolside Pick feature!

 "I'm the world's biggest Engelbert fan!" Myra gushed yesterday. "I've thrown more damp granny-pants at that man than any other gal!" When I pointed out that most of them had been thrown during a home invasion at Mr. Humperdinck's private Beverly Hills residence, an act for which she had been put under a restraining order at the Downey Courthouse, she laughed it off as "girlish hijinks". As jinks go, I consider those pretty low.
Myra's preferred poolside listening this - and every - week is Engelbert's
Warmest Christmas Wishes album. "Engelbert knows what my warmest Christmas wish is," Myra winked. "I wanna be the fairy stuck on the top of his tree! His big old gnarly tree!"

Politely evading her request to "c'mon oil yer granny up, big boy!" I made an excuse and left her twerking enthusiastically to Mr. Humperdinck's disco version of Little Drummer Boy.

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11 comments:

  1. PuffinrandyFebruary 21, 2020 at 3:41 PM

    Arrrgh!!! My eyes, my eyes... man ya just can't un-see something like that!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Farquhar Throckmorton IIIFebruary 21, 2020 at 3:45 PM

      Hmm ... have I over-estimated Th' Four Or Five Guys© enthusiasm to address the issues of Diversity and Body Positivity?

      Delete
    2. pmacFebruary 21, 2020 at 8:20 PM

      Yes, my good man; I believe that you did. Ms. Mac #2 aged like a bottle of wine .............a bottle of Boone's Farm.

      Delete
    3. PuffinrandyFebruary 22, 2020 at 6:21 AM

      Farq, I'm all for body Body Positivity and Diversity... I'm positive that isn't a body I care to see.

      Delete
  2. Crab DevilFebruary 21, 2020 at 7:01 PM

    Frankly, I'd be even more enthusiastic about a different gal with a better figure.

    ReplyDelete
  3. FiveGunsWestFebruary 22, 2020 at 1:46 AM

    She certainly glorifies masturbation.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Farquhar Throckmorton IIIFebruary 22, 2020 at 2:01 AM

    Unless I see a lot more love for Mrs. Nussbaum here I may have to get Cody back.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Fanny BlancmangeFebruary 22, 2020 at 6:38 AM

    I love older ladies, and this gal is one I'd love to love one on one.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Officer Pete "Bananas" BanaslakFebruary 22, 2020 at 6:45 AM

    This peice and all adjoing comments what have been apended is now a desingated Crime Scene. Las Vegas Police Dept. Department NEVADA state of)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Mr. PFebruary 25, 2020 at 5:54 PM

    Now that the fanfare has died down, I'm still looking forward to hearing the disco version of Little Drummer Boy. Christmas is coming and I want to be prepared!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Farquhar Throckmorton IIIFebruary 25, 2020 at 6:24 PM

      Unfortunately, Mr. P, the boys in forensics are still trying to remove the Engelbert disc from the late Mrs. Nussbaum's larynx. I think out of respect, that album will never be uploaded to th' House O' Foam©.

      Delete

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