FalseMemoryFoam© Exclusive Interview With Covid-19!

Covey, in happier times!

You know Covid-19 as the deadly virus that's decimating the human race and causing untold misery and suffering, but few know the cute n' cuddly creature at the heart of the popular pandemic! Covid-19 (or Covey, as he prefers to be known) Skyped me last night as I researched broads in bikinis for an upcoming editorial on ... uh ... on ... [you got nuthin' - Ed.] ... and granted me this historic and exclusive interview!

FMF©: Hey! You're looking good, dude!

C-19: Wish I could say the same for the human race! [LOL]

FMF©: [LOL] But seriously, why don't you take this opportunity to tell the world your side of the story?

C-19: Say! That's a swell idea, Farq! Well, it all started [FX: harp glissando, wavy picture] back in the bat cave - no, not that one - I was getting tired of hanging with a bunch of bats, so when this science-type babe in a white coat suggested I move in with humans - wow! I leaped at the chance! The original idea was to infect Millennials excusively. They'd had their chance and they'd done nothing except make beer out of fruit and tend their beards.

FMF©: A noble mission, Covey, and one for which you get scant credit. Their music is shit, too.

C-19: Tell me about it! But these science-guys, gee, they weren't too on the ball? They gave me access to every human being on the planet! [LOL]

FMF©: Scientists, huh? [circles index finger at forehead]

C-19: So anyway, while I may bring down a bunch of Millennials - high five! - there's beaucoup collateral damage, a lot of good people catching friendly fire. This was never my intention, and it behooves me to broadcast my apology to the world. I'm grateful to FalseMemoryFoam© for platforming my regretfulness.

FMF©: It's been a pleasure, Covey! Say - have you got an album you'd like to share with th' Four Or Five Guys©?

C-19: Indeedy-doody-doodles! It's A Midsummer's Day Dream, by Mark Eric. Nice outdoorsy summery vibe, ideal for that beach party, toasting marshmallows with ... whoops. Oh well.

Yuletide Special Dept. - It's Those Scally Moptop Gobshites!

As the Christmas holidays are with us [eh?- Ed.], we're offloading a whole bunch of stock we have no room for here on th' Isle O' Foam©! First to get kicked into the surf is this tape recording of The Beetles [British beat combo from Manchester - Ed.] that my pal jcc smuggled over in his body cavities. During his hearing he delivered this heartfelt yet futile speech in his defense:

"The legendary Get Back radio broadcast. WBCN FM Boston, September 22, 1969. What's noticeable here, is that this is far and away the best sounding tape of this material you're ever likely to hear. WBCN obtained a reel-to reel tape of the actual reference acetates. Their broadcast was preserved on another high-quality reel, and a digital copy of that tape was used to master this LP. The Best Part of this album is the producers decided to leave in most of the actual commercials and announcements from the WBCN DJ. This provides a charming framework , and sadly reminds us of how much radio has changed."

Blow it out yer ass, jcc. No amount of period charm is going to polish this turd into a Hummel figurine fit to grace my escritoire. But I know a couple of th' Four Or Five Guys© dig these capering comedy lightweights, so Happy Yule to them!

Tom Rush Recovering From Coronavirus Dept.

I just read on an internet that Tom Rush had contracted coronavirus. A hasty search led me to the news that he's recovering. Let's pray he still is.

I've had Voices on constant rotation these last few days - it's much better and richer than I thought on first listen. Full of affection and warmth and strength - and humor. Think a folky JJ Cale with a shit hot Nashville band, and a bunch of songs you'll be singing - and whistling! - along to after a few plays. It's perfect comfort music for the times, and the nicest album of its type since Naturally.


NOTE: His albums re-upped - look for Take It Slow, February.

TL-DR Dept. Kreemé's Kovid Klinic©!

Adam and Eve in Eden, yesterday

In these times of troubled times, we could all use some comforting and wise words to help us live in these times in which we're livin' in. Who better to ask than curvy Kreemé (19), th' Isle O' Foam©'s Senior Entertainment & Media Outreach Officer?

Luckily, my trusty Pifco Brand® tape recorder caught our conversation as we relaxed surfside yesterday, and I transcribe it here for the benefit of th' Four Or Five Guys© what have made th' Isle O' Foam© their home from home!

FT3: I love that color on you. What is it, blue? A tad faster - whoopsie! That got it ...
K: Ew ...
FT3: So, Kreemé - have you got a message for the 4/5 Guys what will give much-needed comfort and solace like unto that which you just gave me?
K: Um ... no. I guess.
FT3: Okay, no biggie ...
K: You can say that again.
FT3: Let's ask Ed up in the Treehouse Of Blessed Forgetfulness© [activates tin can and string communications technology] Ed? Talk to th' Four Or Five Guys© about covid while I rinse off here ...

Ed builds treehouse, yesterday

Ed: Okay. First thing is, the world isn't going to get back to "normal" - the fuck that is - for a couple years. One year to find and test the vaccine, another to roll it out to the slobs in the street. During this time, the global economy is going to collapse, and the money/food/water issue is going to get as serious as the virus.
FT3: Gee, thanks, Ed. Glad I asked.
Ed: Second thing, the planet's taking a breather from all the harm we've done to it. Skies are clearer. Oceans a little cleaner already. Wildlife is venturing into the streets. The human race is a viral threat to the earth. Sure, we've done some swell things - the Pisces Aquarius Capricorn & Jones album ... Fisherman's Friend© Choco Mentho Mint Lozenges ... Tuesday Weld ... but on the whole, we fucked the place up badly. The earth is not about us. And there are just too many people. Nature tries to cull us from time to time, put us in our place. It's cool.
FT3: Cool? A fucking pandemic is sweeping the earth and millions of people are going to die in misery and you say it's cool?
Ed: Well, yeah, fuck it. We were all going to die anyway.
FT3: You got any advice in the mean time, the inbetween time?
Ed: The mean time, the inbetween time is the only time we ever get, but yeah - don't follow the news too much - make your own. Hey - I found some Fat Freddy's Cat comics in the crawlspace!
FT3: The Treehouse of Blessed Forgetfulness© has a crawlspace?
Ed: Yeah - it's called the earth, man [FX: theme from 2001: A Space Odyssey] and it's a wonderful place. Or it could be, again. No airlines, cruise ships ... in a gadda da vida ...

You skipped straight from Kreemé's picture to here, you rascal you! Well, that's okay. Today's Pandemic Panacea is a bunch - maybe all - of Fat Freddy's Cat comics. Enjoy, compadres!

Come Back! He's A Democrat!

"What, me worry?"

John Hall may be the only example of rock musician turned anti-nuclear power activist turned politician turned Member of the House Of Representatives, an office he held in N.Y. from 2007-2011. Yup, while major rock stars were shooting scag and fucking up their lives and getting paid to whine about it, John Hall got involved and made things better for people. And, amazingly, kept on making music.

Antecedently FoamFeatured© in the popular long-running series Who's In My Box?, Hall stirred up enough interest to warrant some kind of overview. Turns out his discography is large enough to tile over Lake Huron, including a bunch of A.O.R. albums that I would have skimmed over like plutonium back when I was a vinyl junkie.

Here's the swell Kangaroo album.

That first solo album, Action (correctly tagged this time).

And a couple of Orleans albums that address the timeless issue of go with the shirts, or not? I'd say with, every time.

John - if you're reading this - and the probability of that is a tad north of 100% - we hope you're staying alive and well, and thanks for being a stand-up guy. And putting your shirt back on.