Oh, I'll admit that at first, when she vouchsafed that it was I of whom she fantasised as she writhed naked on the studio floor recording Eternal Flame, I was flattered. But her persistence - four, five times a night, readers! - quickly became irksome. And recently there's been something undignified about her increasingly desperate attempts to slake her womanly thirsts at the Fountain of my Manhood.
But when she offers me rare recordings - that I know will be enjoyed by th' Four Or Five Guys© - in return for another bout of my priapic prowess (much in demand to cure the Gentle Sex of the Curse of Sapphism) I find it hard to resist. I do it for you, dear readers.
 |
| Look, just LOOK at how she holds the neck of that guitar. Good lord. |
Some of the completed but unreleased Garage Music eventually saw the light of day as The Lost Album, but this is the real deal, including a track for Mike Myers and other songs that didn't get included on the re-think. My cover shews Ms. Hoffs in the actual garage where the music was recorded, in the actual year, and this is the extra yard I go for you feckless ingrates.
Turning Over Susanna Hoffs (something that is, alas, all too familiar to me), is another completed but unissued album from a few years earlier, and again versions of some of the songs appeared later on official releases. My cover, because it never had one.
They're both grand albums from a swell tomato.
THIS JUST IN
Swell download-only promo EP from 2012: diff versions, exclusive songs, live in the studio. Larvely!
This post made possible thru my selfless mastery of the Couch of Concupiscence, the Divan of Desire, the Chaise Longue of Shag, on your behalf. Don't thank me, it'll sound insincere. Just grab the consarned albums and amscray, ya bum.
The Dewey Decimal System - Illuminati Conspiracy or one of the most enduring and widely used library classification systems in the world? Discuss.
ReplyDeleteApparently, dear Farq, as far as Ms is concerned, you will be doubling down with endurance. I shall place my IoF Ducats on that outcome most assuredly.
ReplyDeleteKreemé is of the opinion that "dose bums is too dumb to know the Dewey Decimal System from dere asshole" so I am changing the subject of the Mass Debate to:
ReplyDeleteYour favorite boardgame!
The DDS still stands as a powerhouse for the white christian heterosexual,, or as you might say the euro-american norm, to find all his interests.Nice to have cctv for the sections where deviants roam.
ReplyDeleteI was very good at Risk and I like Go.
"Buccaneer" was the most beautiful board game, total quality. You navigated your pirate ship across a deep blue ocean, laden with glittering treasures. Shame it was a dull game.
ReplyDeleteBackgammon, a game of skill dressed up in luck, or the ancient art of making the wrong move.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing I dislike about backgammon is the look those Greek guys outside restaurants give you after winning so fast you can't tell if they're cheating.
DeleteBastards! ***Shakes fist***
DeleteI will admit to a problem with games: I want to win, and don't always have enough attention, skill, and/or intelligence to do so. I stopped playing them with friends and family because the desire to retaliate when I lost became ...distracting. Chess is very formal, but it also can reward panache. Backgammon has fewer dimensions, but it's certainly a thrill when the dice smile at you. Risk, Stratego, all sorts of wargames have their merits, especially if it keeps you from punching someone.
ReplyDeleteI'm a lover of the Library of Congress cataloging system. However, the local public uses DDS (library, not bar) and I seem to limp along with it just fine.
Nice photographic additions to the post, BTW.
D in California
A plug for the US' Library of Congress system over ye olde DDS.
ReplyDeleteNot much of a board games fella, but my sibs and I wasted copious amounts of time on Monopoly (meh), Yahtzee (game or an Eastern European delight?), and Risk. Irkutsk, anyone?
(grabbing Australia & environs early often served me well; South America too)
"Cosmic Wimp-Out"! Played not on a board, but on a bandana ! Five non-trad dice, packed in a leather pouch! Am I the only one still carrying?
ReplyDeleteYou are, I guess: our pouch disintegrated and the dice eventually migrated away...
DeleteD in California (where "alt" games are popular)
They're still available!
DeleteI need more information, and the that's the first time I said that in a reply to Snorky.
Deletecosmicwimpout.com
DeleteIt's a dice game played with 5 nontraditional dice. One accumulates points depending on the roll. It's best played with 3 to 6 players, and some 'groovy tunes' ( the game was created in the northwest in the 70s, so there's a strong deadhead aspect. sue me), and something smokable. Rules are very flexible.
DeleteThe "garage music" LP cover that you created is my favorite cover you have done (for any artist). The lower-case font usage and the placement are perfect. The photograph (which I have never seen before) is great for a million different reasons. I have the other deliverables from your prior Hoffs posts - and look forward to the "garage music" deliverable. Just when I think you have fully plumbed the depths of this topic - you come up with something more to enjoy. Lucky us!
ReplyDeleteThanks for dem kind woids. It's a mirror self-portrait, of course. The woman is a hotsy-totsy, and would of made a swell model for any of dem Great Artistes such as like Picasso, or Beethoven. Which I also love the straggly hair look.
DeleteHoffs and I were both at the same place, same time: UC Berkeley late 70s, running in the same music circles, but did not cross paths. :(
ReplyDeleteI can see you, reduced to a sweaty, mute wreck, shrinking into a corner as she passes. No, wait - that's me, with Jane Bayley, 1970.
DeleteHaving seen pictures, and knowing my tastes, there's no way I would have been attracted to Ms. Hoffs in 1977. It would have been music-only. Futher research reveals she was at the Pistols concert at Winterland, as was I...but a waif like her was probably not down in front with me, beating the old people hippies in a proto-mosh pit.
DeleteSwell tomato music:
ReplyDeletehttps://www.imagenetz.de/yeqih
Boggle!
ReplyDeletehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boggle
~Jon in Cali
Inconsequentially, quadricentennials, and sesquicentennials.
DeleteAs a tiny brat I must have driven my aunts & uncles bonkers by requesting to play Snakes & Ladders over & over again... Thanks for this neat Hoffs compilation!
ReplyDeleteYou're very welcome - but neither of them is a compilation - they are albums that she recorded but never released (hence the need for covers, which they never had).
DeleteMany thanks Farquhar. SPx
ReplyDeleteCheers big ears!
ReplyDeleteSome Summer Days:
ReplyDeletehttps://www.imagenetz.de/ULoZa
Thanks, Don Farq--much appreciated.
ReplyDeleteThanks for these! Always love Mz. H!
ReplyDeleteBest albums? Her self-titled second album, and Someday. I appreciate her covers albums without needing to hear them again. As a songwriter, she's undervalued, and worth more attention than she gets. "No beekeeper goes unstung."
ReplyDeleteA bit late for the whole boardgame discussion
DeleteParks
Ticket To Ride and its many variations (fave: Pennsylvania)
The Settlers of Catan
basically all the strategy games that are on the edge between casual gamers and serious game nerds, and that you can play with the kids
Don't know any of these.
DeleteI was reasonably good at chess as a kid, but suddenly couldn't see the point of it any more. Losing made you feel bad, and winning was the big "so what?" turning point in my young life. The whole thing seemed stupid, and still does.