IoF© Spatial Additions® Dept.

Since 1965, when the House O' Foam© [left - Ed.] was established in bosky downtown Las Vegas, it's been a tradition to create Spatial Addition® albums by selected artistes, showing them what they should have done - where they went wrong, and how it's not too late to get it right. Beautifully packaged, impeccably curated and imaginatively sequenced, IoF© Spatial Additions® are lavishly praised by the artists! Paul McCartney was "embarrassed by the quality and concept" of the Spatial Addition® Aloha, adding "it's everything we should have done, only better! If this gets a legitimate release, I'll be rich!"

Actual size

In response to massive demand [Ken Massive, Tar Flats Motor Court, ND - Ed.] these heirloom Spatial Additions© are being made available again in exclusive Spatial Addition® Gift Sets! Yes, friends, these beloved albums, long out of print, are being reissued in Numbered and Limited Legacy Box Sets, each bearing a Certificate Of Authenticity [left - Ed.] endorsed by the Federal Bureau of Narcotics and individually signed [thumbprint - Ed.] by Farquhar Throckmorton III! Suitable for framing, you'll be proud to display this prestigious document in den or lobby!

As a FoamBonus™, you'll also receive this swell wallet-size Art Photo of Marine Biologist Kreemé [18 my ass - Ed.], th' IoF©'s resident Diversity Outreach Executive!

Did I hear you say quality? Here at th' IoF©, Quality is out of Control! That's why all recordings are hi-res 64bit 392khz to satisfy most discerning hi-fi enthusiast! To guarantee ultra-fast download time your busy lifestyle demands, all files Digitally Transitioned™ @192 with no loss of fidelity! Simply use proprietary third-party application to restore original file size!

Our first Legacy Box Set is Pop-Psych, UK Style! Here's what you get:

Chasing Rainbows - Nirvana

"Maybe if we'd released this I'd still be alive!" - Kurt Cobain

Replaces everything in their catalog except Simon Simopath. No filler! Included at no extra cost is the full, twelve track edition of Simon Simopath, unavailable in stores! You can safely trash everything else in your collection by this enigmatic and inconsistent Swingin' London duo!

Petals - The Hollies

"Hey! Allan! Fuck you!" - Graham Nash

Instead of making this, they made the shit Hollies Sing Dylan in a shit sleeve, and suffered the consequences. Dumbasses. Graham Nash had clearly been listening to the Beach Boys' Friends, and the amazing King Midas In Reverse finds a home at last.

High As A Kite Over Maryon Park - The Small Faces

"Hahaha-aaargh ... hualp!" - Steve Marriott

Twelve cute n' sparkly cuts of pure Carnaby Street blotter acid. What you always wanted from the Smalls but never got. Until now. Blow Up fans will recognise title reference.

Liquid Sunshine Donovan - Donovan

"Just don't mention the Stromberg Twins" - Donovan

A glowing harvest of his psychiest songs, carefully omitting your favorites. This is everything the miserly little goblin ever did that I want to hear again, but your mileage will differ. Note hidden drug reference in title.

Aloha - The Beatles

"The best album we never made" - Paul McCartney

It is universally agreed - at least in my house - that the Beatles went to shit after Sgt. Pepper, losing the plot and their grasp on contemporary culture. Here's what they should have been doing in '68, a year lost to vanity projects, record label marketing initiatives, and bickering. And heroin.

All the songs [see back cover, left - Ed.] were recorded between Pepper and The Gray Album, and none was released on a Beatle-created album. Aloha sounds exactly like what it is - the Great Lost Beatles Album, and why the idea hasn't occurred to anybody else is a magical mystery to me. Imagine this in the racks of your friendly local record store - would you clasp it to your hollow bosom with a glad cry? Of course you would. Better than Pepper? Better songs and bursting with hits, so yeah.

Omen & Illiad - The Zombies

"Didn't we just do this one?" - Ken Massive

This is here by mistake. So you get two copies awready - quit yer gripin' n' whinin' n' eat yer goddamn peas.

Box Set Numero Deux,  for your listening pleasure:

The Charlatans aborted first album on Kama Sutra - nine tracks is all we have from the original sessions. The cover is a rare original "printer's slick", never used. A damn shame!

Buffalo Springfield's first - a wonderful album, bafflingly underappreciated, in the cover it deserves. Mono/stereo versions, thirteen tracks, essential.

The Byrds Captain America - the original title for the Ballad Of Easy Rider album. "Complete" thirty track edition.

Grateful Dead, pre-first album. Sounds like a great record to me. The famous Herb Greene photograph married to contemporary Bridget Riley Op Art, with a little added distortion.

Kaleidoscope - all fourteen (!) of their non-album studio tracks collected for your listening convenience! Ultra-swell.

The Chocolate Watch Band album purists will hate - these are the impeccably produced Ed Cobb tracks, using session musicians. Groovy!

Further Spatial Addition® Gift Sets to be added right here, to this post, if I get my shit together.