Play "Who's In My Box?" With Mrs. Myra Nussbaum!

Thanks to quantum mechanics allowing multiverse rebirths, body-diversity icon Mrs. Myra Nussbaum makes a welcome return to th' Isle O' Foam©! 

Older readers may remember her brutal poolside murder back when th' House O' Foam© was located in bosky downtown Las Vegas. Sleuth dream team Lt. Columbo and Jessica Fletcher eventually nailed Gwyneth Paltrow (out of The Police) for clubbing the much-loved grandmother to death with an Engelbert Humperdinck CD. But that was then, and this is now.

Few knew that Mrs. Nussbaum was also something of an authority on Third Stream Jazz. "That's right, hep cats!" said Myra yesterday from her cabana inside the smoking crater of Mysterious Volcano. "Sure, critics have argued that third stream—by drawing on two very different styles—dilutes the power of each in combining them. They can blow it out their ass!"

Let's all take a peek at the piece Myra has tucked away in her barnacle-encrusted sea chest, and see if we can guess - who's in Myra's Box!?

Your Favorite Album Covers (Probably) Dept. - Your Favorite Album Covers (Probably)

Here's sambgodot's bestest, probably [above - Ed.]. Nice scan of the first edition (probably), shrinkwrapped for your convenience. Name your candidate in the comments, and I'll add it to the gallery. It's not like you have anything better to do right now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We Getz It!

Of course you gots these swell jazz sides awready. What's that you say? You did useta but your main twist Zelda scratched the living shit outta them? Your Third Avenue duplex got tossed and these were the only albums the bums took? You left them on the back shelf of your '58 Fairlane at the beach and, like, they got totally warped? Well, okay. Here they are again. Look after 'em better this time. Gwan! Beat it before I change my mind!

 

That Underrated First Album Thing Dept. - The Buffys

I never understood why the first Buffalo Springfield album is passed over so easily. The band were apparently dissatisfied with the production, and as often happens the artist's opinion - never the most reliable when it comes to their own work - gets accepted as Critical Truth. The album was cut in '66, and the production sounds exactly of its time. It sounds swell. Maybe because studio techniques evolved so quickly back then, they felt they could have done better if they'd waited a couple weeks.

The cover didn't help - a rush paste-up by some anonymous random who - against all the evidence - thought black was the way to go. And taking up a third of the area with a butt-ugly logo. And using the first photographs they found in the file. Tinted red. This here replacement took me a pleasant thirty minutes, and it's already a more attractive proposition. You'd snatch this sucker out of the racks if you saw it and run screaming into the street.

Deliverables: mono and stereo remasters from the What's That Sound? package. Song for song, it's one of the best rock and pop debuts ever.

Great Classics Of Literature Out Th' Ass Dept. - Friday Crumbtacular!

For late arrivals, the title of this much-beloved and long-running FoamFeature© comes from The Shawshank Redemption, where "Chesty" Morgan Freeman [are you sure about this? - Ed.], as library trusty, tells Tim Robbins that they - the library - have "literature out th' ass." This always struck me as sublime.

Anyhoo, today's Bumper Blisterpack O' Books© contains the titles at left [left - Ed.], which don't appear in the text of this post on account it hides them from sketchy internet randoms.

The "Bible" came out sideways, unfortunately. Maybe you can swivel your old nogggin 90 degrees. Turn your computer screen around. Not my problem. You shouldn't be looking at this stuff anyways. For shame.